Once, I was wondering what at all makes me cry? Why do I get so worried, sad, distressed? Depressed! like why? Sometimes I ask why at all did I come into this family? It’s just been nothing but pain and anguish.
But then, truth be told, should these things have not had happened, maybe, just maybe I would not be where I find myself today. It hurts so badly that sometimes I wish I was non existent, but the question is “what if you really were none existent?” Do you know how it would feel like? Do you know what would have happened? Remember everything works out for our good! Today I wouldn’t want to bore you with so much, but then I would like to get this message across.
Sometimes you are where you are not because you deserve to be there, but because it is your foundation to building that “mansion.” If things shouldn’t have happened to you, you may have been an epitome of something worse.
Today is exactly a year ago I was gifted a counselor as a birthday gift. Trust me, it wasn’t an easy task always opening up to people and to God. But then, the good news is, there was a transformation! I didn’t really get all I wanted to get but it really helped me to quite accept and understand this version of who I was and what I was and what I am becoming.
It took that conscious effort to get things right. I wouldn’t say I am perfect but I am a better version of myself. All I really want to say is that, it’s time to let it go. Those experiences, those pains, the torture, the memories, the cold nights, just name them. You have to let go of them. To overcome is to accept, to accept is to know, to know is to let it go. I believe you would agree with me that you find yourself standing at the same very spot. You are not progressing you are just where you are and this is what I would call “the devil in me.” In as much as these pains and suffering exist, you need to make the conscious effort to see them as ‘angels’ and not the devil, else you wil never move. Yes! I know it’s really not easy, but take it a step at a time; day by day you will get there. It took me several years to be able to look into the mirror and say to myself girllll you are beautiful or even the hand made of the Lord. Till date, it’s still not easy to stand before a camera, but then I am gradually overcoming it. look at my profile on “about author.” You will see my picture there. Something I could never do; to lie on my bed, or sit to write and encourage someone. To stand out as one who is a wounded healer. But hey, wondering what I did? I knew, hence I accepted, I decided to let go! How? By seeking help. It all start from somewhere. It’s a special day today for me and my mum, and this is what I have to share. I am not super woman by the way, I still do struggle and have my own ‘episodes’ when it comes to the pains, anguish etc. But I am able to do what I do today because I have decided to let go.
Remember the song from the disney cartoon Frozen?
Let it go
Let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn around and slam the door
I don’t care what you going to say
The storm rages out
The cold never bothered me anyway
Enough of the hiding, let it go and step up your game. Claim that movie, accept it as your story and finally let it go.
Coincidentally, today is get over it day. You may read that here https://glofacts.com/blog/2021/03/09/today-is-get-it-over-day/
